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  • Agi Tiara Pranoto

    Agi Tiara Pranoto

    Seorang Blogger Indonesia yang berdomisili di Yogyakarta. Selain menulis, dia juga sangat hobi bermain game FPS. Cita-citanya adalah mendapatkan passive income sehingga tidak perlu bekerja di kantor, apa daya selama cita-cita itu belum tercapai, dia harus menikmati hari-harinya sebagai mediator kesehatan.
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    Saya akhirnya telah mencapai titik lelah menggunakan Macintosh. Kali ini saya serius, saya benar-benar pindah Operating System.

    Kenapa pindah Operating System menjadi sebuah cerita baru buat saya? Karena saya sudah 13 tahun menggunakan mac--10 tahun bahkan secara eksklusif menggunakan mac tanpa produk windows sampingan. Saya menggunakan ekosistem apple untuk sehari-hari, kecuali untuk apple watch yang rentan hilang dikala tangan pegal-pegal.

    Jujur ada banyak hal yang saya sukai dari macintosh. Keyboard yang nyaman sebelum butterfly switch menyerang, trackpad yang akurat dan kaya gestur, tampilan aplikasi yang menawan, kemudahan untuk airdrop dan handoff sehingga saya bisa copy paste dari laptop ke handphone dan handphone ke laptop dengan cepat, sampai layar yang emang.... aduh pokoknya nggak bikin mata capek. Tapi itu semua telah tergantikan dengan kebutuhan baru:

    Yaitu Genshin Impact.

    Karena kita anaknya punya motto Harta, Tahta dan Gacha. 

    Nggak deng, bukan cuma Genshin Impact. Saya mulai merasa kalau macbook yang saya gunakan sudah lagi nggak mendukung kebutuhan pekerjaan freelance saya yang semakin hari semakin banyak, misalnya saja analisis data menggunakan office yang mana lambannya bikin inget Tuhan di Mac, render ini itu yang makin hari makin banyak aja rasanya, sampai ngisi e-filing pajak. Tapi yang paling penting adalah ini saya punya koleksi games di steam, ubisoft, origin, epic dan riot yang nggak kepake banyak banget karena ga disupport Mac lagi.

    Jadi dengan berat hati, saya memutuskan untuk... Build PC

    Kenapa PC? Kenapa Bukan Laptop Gaming?

    Jujur saya bukan tipe blogger/gamer zuma yang kemudian akan mengiklankan laptop gaming pemakaian sehari-hari. Laptop gaming itu jelas nggak masuk budget dan kebutuhan saya secara kita anaknya UMR jogja garis keras.

    Ini adalah pengalaman dan kebutuhan saya sendiri ya, bukan untuk mendiscourage kalian beli laptop gaming atau menjelek-jelekkan laptop gaming. 

    Secakep-cakepnya laptop gaming, semantap-mantapnya laptop gaming, spek yang bisa kita utak atik itu terbatas. Belum lagi penampilan kebanyakan laptop gaming yang nyala-nyala kaya odong-odong dengan RGB yang warnanya bikin sakit kepala seringkali membuat saya malas dengan laptop gaming.

    ((tentunya enggak semua laptop gaming bentuknya seperti odong-odong ya, tapi yang saya taksir kaya Razer Blade harganya beneran bikin kantong bolong))

    Apalagi, kita sebagai gamer zuma sejati jelas sudah punya line up keyboard gaming sendiri. Jadi alamat nantinya itu laptop mahal-mahal dengan teknologi layar aneh aneh itu  tetap akan dicolok ke monitor eksternal--secara, apa sih yang kamu harapkan dengan ngegame di layar 15 inchi?

    Terus pake keyboard sendiri. Mouse sendiri. 

    Cuma bisa dibawa ke kasur aja kalo lagi mager duduk di kursi. Udah begitulah inti pikiran saya soal laptop gaming. 

    Pun kalo mau bicara soal portabilitas, kebanyakan laptop gaming yang harganya masuk di budget saya itu bulky dan berat. Mau bawa-bawa keluar rumah malas, mending bawa iPad yang bisa masuk tas cantik. Jadi sudahlah sekalian saja saya build PC. 


    Adaptasi Dari Mac ke PC

    Ini susah banget. 13 tahun bukan waktu yang sebentar untuk beradaptasi dari sebuah ekosistem ke ekosistem lainnya. Kenapa saya bilang ekosistem? Karena saya adalah Apple fangirl lol. 

    Pekerjaan part-time pertama saya ketika kuliah adalah menjadi campus ambassador (aka anak marketing) di Emax My Campus yang notabene jualan apple. Saya pengguna iPod dari shuffle sampai iPod Touch, lalu iPhone, iPad, Macbook, dan iMac. Jadi kurang Apple apalagi?

    Jadi untuk transfer file foto dan video saya sudah nyaman banget menggunakan iTunes (dulunya) dan Airdrop. Untuk edit video saya sudah punya Final Cut Pro. Untuk musik saya terbantu banget dengan keberadaan Logic yang harganya murah meriah untuk ukuran DAW + menggunakan iPad sebagai MIDI Controllernya. Pokoknya udah saya anaknya Apple banget.

    Salah satu yang bikin saya berpindah adalah karena semenjak OSX Catalina, menggunakan WINE untuk menjalankan program-program windows jadi ribet banget. Saya jadi ngga bisa memainkan games-games yang biasa saya mainkan atau menggunakan program-program berbasis windows di Mac. Transisi Hard Disk dari HFS+ ke APFS yang seolah memaksa saya untuk berpindah ke SSD juga membuat saya kewalahan. Afterall, SSD dengan ukuran yang besar masih cukup mahal.

    Jadi intinya saya lagi kere dan nggak bisa upgrade macbook saya yang semakin uzur. Akhirnya berbekal kenekatan dan keinginan keras untuk kembali main DOTA2 dan Genshin Impact dalam damai akhirnya saya merakit PC. 

    Yang pertama berasa adalah: betapa murahnya merakit PC, pantes semua orang bachot ngomong "mending rakit PC aja"

    "Mending Rakit PC Aja"

    Saya merakit PC di salah satu toko komputer terkemuka di Jogja yaitu Starcomp. Kebetulan saya sedang nemenin Kak Arum benerin Ram dan salah satu salesnya menawarkan untuk merakitkan PC sesuai dengan spek yang saya butuhkan. Nggak sampai setengah jam, saya sudah diwhatsapp dengan quotation harga dan spek yang tentunya masih bisa saya otak-atik.

    Pikiran pertama saya: MURAH SEKALI YA HANYA DENGAN 5 JUTA LEBIH SAYA SUDAH BISA PUNYA CPU DENGAN SPEK YANG CUKUP UNTUK NGEDIT FOTO, NGONTEN DAN TENTUNYA NGEGAME.

    Tentunya saya seneng banget dong. Langsung aja saya beli. Kak Arum sampai geleng-geleng kepala. Besok siangnya itu PC langsung jadi dan bisa dibawa pulang. 

    Karena saya orangnya ((extra)), budget 5 juta lebih itu tentu saja naik dengan alasan butuh RAM buat rendering, butuh HDD buat nyimpen games dan tentunya butuh VGA yang lebih mumpuni (yang ini belom kebeli karena yang saya maunya yang mahal lol)

    *habis itu bingung sendiri entar balik modalnya gimana*

    Kondisinya saya sudah punya monitor sendiri ya (LG 22MK600) jadi pengeluaran saya jauh lebih hemat, kapan-kapan saya cerita soal monitor saya ya. 

    Pengen Balik Ke Apple Nggak?

    Jujur saya kangen Airdrop. Saya kangen banget mindahin file dengan mudah antara HP dan laptop. Saya kangen banget mencet tombol command dan tentunya saya kangen banget sama mighty trackpadnya apple. 

    Tapi itu semua termaafkan dengan bisa main Apex Legends sepuasnya dan buka microsoft office dengan wuzwuzwuz. Maafkan saya Apple, tapi versi Microsoft Office for Mac itu lemot banget, eke nggak suka. 

    Selain itu saya juga leluasa menggunakan hard disk dengan format NTFS--format yang jelas nggak disupport oleh MacOS. 

    sebagai pengguna Mac dari jaman OSX Leopard (yang mana dulu mau upgrade OS aja berbayar!) saya jelas masih susah move on dari beberapa fitur-fitur MacOS, tapi saya masih bisa dengan mudah menemukan substitusinya di Windows. 

    Kecuali untuk DAW ya, karena sampe sekarang saya belum paham cara pake frooty loops dan belom mampu beli license Ableton *menangis dipojokan*

    Mac atau Windows

    Jadi Mac atau Windows? 

    Jujur bagi saya sama saja. Wong yang membedakan memang cuma interface dan environment-nya saja. 

    Saya memang sudah akrab dengan command-command di Mac (sudo killall anyone?) dan bagaimana bernavigasi ria di finder Mac, jadi pas pindah ke windows saya masih kagok (ternyata preview pane di explorer windows ga ngasi detil lebih seperti di mac)

    Tapi kalau soal support ke banyak aplikasi, saya masih prefer windows. Akhirnya mengisi SPT ga perlu nebeng laptop orang cuma buat buka e-form :p

    Sisanya sama, cuma harus membiasakan diri untuk mencet ctrl instead of cmd wkwkwk

    Pertanyaannya, kalau bisa pake dua-duanya, kenapa harus milih salah satu? lol.
    . Rabu, 17 Februari 2021 .

    ((Pulang)) Ke Windows Setelah 13 Tahun Menggunakan Mac

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    . Rabu, 17 Februari 2021 .

    Saya akhirnya telah mencapai titik lelah menggunakan Macintosh. Kali ini saya serius, saya benar-benar pindah Operating System.

    Kenapa pindah Operating System menjadi sebuah cerita baru buat saya? Karena saya sudah 13 tahun menggunakan mac--10 tahun bahkan secara eksklusif menggunakan mac tanpa produk windows sampingan. Saya menggunakan ekosistem apple untuk sehari-hari, kecuali untuk apple watch yang rentan hilang dikala tangan pegal-pegal.

    Jujur ada banyak hal yang saya sukai dari macintosh. Keyboard yang nyaman sebelum butterfly switch menyerang, trackpad yang akurat dan kaya gestur, tampilan aplikasi yang menawan, kemudahan untuk airdrop dan handoff sehingga saya bisa copy paste dari laptop ke handphone dan handphone ke laptop dengan cepat, sampai layar yang emang.... aduh pokoknya nggak bikin mata capek. Tapi itu semua telah tergantikan dengan kebutuhan baru:

    Yaitu Genshin Impact.

    Karena kita anaknya punya motto Harta, Tahta dan Gacha. 

    Nggak deng, bukan cuma Genshin Impact. Saya mulai merasa kalau macbook yang saya gunakan sudah lagi nggak mendukung kebutuhan pekerjaan freelance saya yang semakin hari semakin banyak, misalnya saja analisis data menggunakan office yang mana lambannya bikin inget Tuhan di Mac, render ini itu yang makin hari makin banyak aja rasanya, sampai ngisi e-filing pajak. Tapi yang paling penting adalah ini saya punya koleksi games di steam, ubisoft, origin, epic dan riot yang nggak kepake banyak banget karena ga disupport Mac lagi.

    Jadi dengan berat hati, saya memutuskan untuk... Build PC

    Kenapa PC? Kenapa Bukan Laptop Gaming?

    Jujur saya bukan tipe blogger/gamer zuma yang kemudian akan mengiklankan laptop gaming pemakaian sehari-hari. Laptop gaming itu jelas nggak masuk budget dan kebutuhan saya secara kita anaknya UMR jogja garis keras.

    Ini adalah pengalaman dan kebutuhan saya sendiri ya, bukan untuk mendiscourage kalian beli laptop gaming atau menjelek-jelekkan laptop gaming. 

    Secakep-cakepnya laptop gaming, semantap-mantapnya laptop gaming, spek yang bisa kita utak atik itu terbatas. Belum lagi penampilan kebanyakan laptop gaming yang nyala-nyala kaya odong-odong dengan RGB yang warnanya bikin sakit kepala seringkali membuat saya malas dengan laptop gaming.

    ((tentunya enggak semua laptop gaming bentuknya seperti odong-odong ya, tapi yang saya taksir kaya Razer Blade harganya beneran bikin kantong bolong))

    Apalagi, kita sebagai gamer zuma sejati jelas sudah punya line up keyboard gaming sendiri. Jadi alamat nantinya itu laptop mahal-mahal dengan teknologi layar aneh aneh itu  tetap akan dicolok ke monitor eksternal--secara, apa sih yang kamu harapkan dengan ngegame di layar 15 inchi?

    Terus pake keyboard sendiri. Mouse sendiri. 

    Cuma bisa dibawa ke kasur aja kalo lagi mager duduk di kursi. Udah begitulah inti pikiran saya soal laptop gaming. 

    Pun kalo mau bicara soal portabilitas, kebanyakan laptop gaming yang harganya masuk di budget saya itu bulky dan berat. Mau bawa-bawa keluar rumah malas, mending bawa iPad yang bisa masuk tas cantik. Jadi sudahlah sekalian saja saya build PC. 


    Adaptasi Dari Mac ke PC

    Ini susah banget. 13 tahun bukan waktu yang sebentar untuk beradaptasi dari sebuah ekosistem ke ekosistem lainnya. Kenapa saya bilang ekosistem? Karena saya adalah Apple fangirl lol. 

    Pekerjaan part-time pertama saya ketika kuliah adalah menjadi campus ambassador (aka anak marketing) di Emax My Campus yang notabene jualan apple. Saya pengguna iPod dari shuffle sampai iPod Touch, lalu iPhone, iPad, Macbook, dan iMac. Jadi kurang Apple apalagi?

    Jadi untuk transfer file foto dan video saya sudah nyaman banget menggunakan iTunes (dulunya) dan Airdrop. Untuk edit video saya sudah punya Final Cut Pro. Untuk musik saya terbantu banget dengan keberadaan Logic yang harganya murah meriah untuk ukuran DAW + menggunakan iPad sebagai MIDI Controllernya. Pokoknya udah saya anaknya Apple banget.

    Salah satu yang bikin saya berpindah adalah karena semenjak OSX Catalina, menggunakan WINE untuk menjalankan program-program windows jadi ribet banget. Saya jadi ngga bisa memainkan games-games yang biasa saya mainkan atau menggunakan program-program berbasis windows di Mac. Transisi Hard Disk dari HFS+ ke APFS yang seolah memaksa saya untuk berpindah ke SSD juga membuat saya kewalahan. Afterall, SSD dengan ukuran yang besar masih cukup mahal.

    Jadi intinya saya lagi kere dan nggak bisa upgrade macbook saya yang semakin uzur. Akhirnya berbekal kenekatan dan keinginan keras untuk kembali main DOTA2 dan Genshin Impact dalam damai akhirnya saya merakit PC. 

    Yang pertama berasa adalah: betapa murahnya merakit PC, pantes semua orang bachot ngomong "mending rakit PC aja"

    "Mending Rakit PC Aja"

    Saya merakit PC di salah satu toko komputer terkemuka di Jogja yaitu Starcomp. Kebetulan saya sedang nemenin Kak Arum benerin Ram dan salah satu salesnya menawarkan untuk merakitkan PC sesuai dengan spek yang saya butuhkan. Nggak sampai setengah jam, saya sudah diwhatsapp dengan quotation harga dan spek yang tentunya masih bisa saya otak-atik.

    Pikiran pertama saya: MURAH SEKALI YA HANYA DENGAN 5 JUTA LEBIH SAYA SUDAH BISA PUNYA CPU DENGAN SPEK YANG CUKUP UNTUK NGEDIT FOTO, NGONTEN DAN TENTUNYA NGEGAME.

    Tentunya saya seneng banget dong. Langsung aja saya beli. Kak Arum sampai geleng-geleng kepala. Besok siangnya itu PC langsung jadi dan bisa dibawa pulang. 

    Karena saya orangnya ((extra)), budget 5 juta lebih itu tentu saja naik dengan alasan butuh RAM buat rendering, butuh HDD buat nyimpen games dan tentunya butuh VGA yang lebih mumpuni (yang ini belom kebeli karena yang saya maunya yang mahal lol)

    *habis itu bingung sendiri entar balik modalnya gimana*

    Kondisinya saya sudah punya monitor sendiri ya (LG 22MK600) jadi pengeluaran saya jauh lebih hemat, kapan-kapan saya cerita soal monitor saya ya. 

    Pengen Balik Ke Apple Nggak?

    Jujur saya kangen Airdrop. Saya kangen banget mindahin file dengan mudah antara HP dan laptop. Saya kangen banget mencet tombol command dan tentunya saya kangen banget sama mighty trackpadnya apple. 

    Tapi itu semua termaafkan dengan bisa main Apex Legends sepuasnya dan buka microsoft office dengan wuzwuzwuz. Maafkan saya Apple, tapi versi Microsoft Office for Mac itu lemot banget, eke nggak suka. 

    Selain itu saya juga leluasa menggunakan hard disk dengan format NTFS--format yang jelas nggak disupport oleh MacOS. 

    sebagai pengguna Mac dari jaman OSX Leopard (yang mana dulu mau upgrade OS aja berbayar!) saya jelas masih susah move on dari beberapa fitur-fitur MacOS, tapi saya masih bisa dengan mudah menemukan substitusinya di Windows. 

    Kecuali untuk DAW ya, karena sampe sekarang saya belum paham cara pake frooty loops dan belom mampu beli license Ableton *menangis dipojokan*

    Mac atau Windows

    Jadi Mac atau Windows? 

    Jujur bagi saya sama saja. Wong yang membedakan memang cuma interface dan environment-nya saja. 

    Saya memang sudah akrab dengan command-command di Mac (sudo killall anyone?) dan bagaimana bernavigasi ria di finder Mac, jadi pas pindah ke windows saya masih kagok (ternyata preview pane di explorer windows ga ngasi detil lebih seperti di mac)

    Tapi kalau soal support ke banyak aplikasi, saya masih prefer windows. Akhirnya mengisi SPT ga perlu nebeng laptop orang cuma buat buka e-form :p

    Sisanya sama, cuma harus membiasakan diri untuk mencet ctrl instead of cmd wkwkwk

    Pertanyaannya, kalau bisa pake dua-duanya, kenapa harus milih salah satu? lol.
    . Selasa, 17 September 2019 .


    Indonesia negaraku, orangnya lucu-lucu.

    Kemarin, jagat twitter ramai gara-gara cuitan para buzzer salah satu program pemerintah yaitu #SawitBaik. Now don't get me wrong, i have nothing against Sawit karena mama juga pensiunan salah satu perusahaan Sawit terbesar di Indonesia. 

    Yang jadi masalah adalah timingnya. Di Riau lagi ada kebakaran hutan--well, tiap tahun selalu ada kebakaran hutan di Sumatera dan Kalimantan yang mengakibatkan kabut asap gila-gilaan di Indonesia sampai asapnya 'mampir' ke Malaysia dan Singapore. 

    Kebakaran Hutan itu ditengarai karena adanya lahan hutan yang dibakar untuk menjadi kebun dan komoditas perkebunan di Sumatera dan Kalimantan yang paling menjanjikan dari segi ekonomi ya Sawit.

    Di saat-saat demikian, pemerintah memutuskan untuk launching campaign Sawit Baik. Kan Lucu.

    Kenapa sih Harus Trending Topic?

    Orang tua-orang tua kita di pemerintahan ini memang terkadang suka trying too hard to be relevant. Dipikirnya menggunakan buzzer, lantas semua permasalahan publikasi negara selesai.

    Ntar dulu. 

    Masyarakat Indonesia lagi eneg-enegnya sama Buzzer, Influencer dan profesi-profesi sejenis itu. Blogger bikin review dibilangnya "waaah pasti berbayar! pasti endorse" dengan semangat menghakimi bahwa produk endorse yang jadi favorit dan 'kesukaan aku banget' itu pasti sebenernya B ajah. 

    Kenapa saya bisa bilang begitu? Karena dari zaman awkarin masih naik kuda pake beha dan topeng mas-mas perampok di sinetron Indonesia tahun 1990an itulah kalimat-kalimat yang rajin bercokol di akun-akun pergosipan dunia maya. Nggak percaya? Ih coba aja baca sendiri.

    Tapi ya saya paham sih. Saya juga termasuk yang nggak gampang kemakan iklan, dan dengan ratusan influencer di berbagai platform sosial media menjejali kita dengan konten iklan setiap harinya, wajar aja sih kalo orang-orang jengah.

    Buktinya, kalian lebih seneng saya nulis yang begini-begini ini kan? Tulisan-tulisan yang memancing keributan gini kan? Kenyataannya memang tulisan-tulisan saya nggak bersponsor seperti ini memang punya lebih banyak pembaca. Cerita soal macil aja viewsnya masih lebih banyak ketimbang beberapa pillar article saya yang lain; walo bisa jadi si macil ngeklik in sendiri artikel dia sampe eneg, bisa aja kan?

    Kok jadi bahas macil sih huft.

    Balik lagi, kemaren saya melihat salah satu upaya para opa-opa di pemerintahan kita ini untuk relevan adalah dengan menggunakan sosmed. Bagus sih, tapi engga tahu target. Bahkan ada aja tuh buzzer yang kontennya ga relevan sekedar menaikkan hashtag biar trending. Nggak usah di screenshot lah ya, menuh-menuhin kuota hosting aja.

    Terus kalo udah trending mau ngapain? Output sesudah trending apa? Memang habis trending terus masyarakat auto-teredukasi gitu? Atau emang trending itu sebenarnya malah Key Performance Index? 

    Nggak Semua Hal Perlu Jadi Trending Topic Buat Viral

    Saya kadang bertanya-tanya, ada ga sik mahasiswa periklanan atau komunikasi korporat di pemerintahan? Soalnya kadang-kadang strategi buzzing pemerintah suka salah kaprah.

    Biar ga negatif, gini ya saya kasih contoh baiknya.

    Kalian tahu akun Ditjen Pajak? ituloh yang suka me-ninuninuninu netizen kaya raya. Seriusan. Akun Ditjen Pajak itu bisa dikenang sama warganet karena ya kontennya refreshing, nggak perlu trending topic #MasyarakatSadarPajak #PesanMenteriKeuanganPentingBangetBacaDong #BayarPajakTerus dan lain sebagainya.

    Cukup ngasih informasi yang relevan, meninuninu netizen dan memberi respon saat ada pertanyaan-pertanyaan yang penting-nggak-penting dari netizen.

    Akun lain yang sukses menurut saya adalah TNI AU dengan Airminnya yang menghibur, informatif, lucu dan receh-receh, sukses bikin citra TNI yang serem dan siap tempur anytime jadi merasa terhibur, jadi inget kalo TNI ya manusia juga yang doyan dangdutan dan pergi kondangan. Gak pake buzzing, gak pake trending topic, tapi orang inget. 

    Atau yang paling luar biasa: Kementerian PUPR yang doyan membuat Meme soal menterinya sendiri. Pak Basuki emang luar biasa kesabarannya karena memenya lucu-lucu, dan hasilnya, saya jadi tahu ada kementerian yang namanya Kementerian PUPR dan segala program-programnya. Sebagai milenial generasi akhir yang nggak dapat kurikulum PPKN dan P4, ini sebenarnya pencapaian besar loh. 

    Haloooo pemerintah, orang tuh buka sosmed pengen refreshing, bukan pengen dibombardir sama agenda-agenda pemerintahan. Kalo mau ngasi tau agenda pemerintahan, gunakanlah cara-cara yang smooth dan bikin happy. 

    Dunia Teknologi Itu Seperti Fast Moving Goods

    Saya selalu bilang begini setiap dapet klien korporat. Apa yang kita anggap keren kemarin belum tentu relevan hari ini, dalam hitungan detik opini masyarakat bisa berubah seiring dengan datangnya informasi-informasi baru. 

    Trend itu bukan hanya dianalisa berdasarkan angka-angka yang muncul di statistika anda, melainkan dirasakan. Key opinion leader itu bukan cuma jendela untuk mengemukakan opini saja, tapi harus dibentuk supaya Opini mereka memang tercermin dari tindak tanduk dan perbuatan mereka juga.

    Kenapa? Karena orang-orang yang memfollow KOL itu bisa jadi lebih kenal KOL tersebut ketimbang anda-anda yang mensponsori. Makanya, riset-riset dan riset.

    Saya yakin kampanye Sawit Baik itu sebenarnya kampanye dan aktivasi yang sudah disusun sejak lama (seenggaknya tidak dalam hitungan hari), terbukti grafisnya oke, acara tersusun rapi dan lain sebagainya.

    Tapi timing launchnya sama sekali nggak tepat.

    Mungkin kalo di launch bersamaan dengan inisiasi energi alternatif, bisa diangkat itu soal biodieselnya Sawit. Mungkin kalo di launch dengan kampanye hari konsumen + diskon-diskon produk sawit maka Sawit akan kelihatan lebih enticing buat masyarakat penikmat sosmed.

    Mau melawan hoax? Tidak perlu trending topic! Buat klarifikasi dengan data yang memadai dan tentunya data yang tepat dong. Beri masyarakat insight soal bagaimana sawit menyokong kehidupan negara dengan cara yang smooth. Tingkatin dong kewajiban CSR Perusahaan Sawit sampe segede Perusahaan Tembakau misalnya. 

    Spin control itu ada seninya. Makanya mahal. 

    Saya Juga Buzzer Makanya Saya Ngomong Begini

    Meski sangat menolak predikat buzzer di bio saya karena plis deh, saya itu anaknya paling males disuruh ngebuzz, naikin TT dan lain-lain kalo nggak sesuai dengan haluan kehidupan tapi saya juga buzzer.

    Kenapa ngebuzz? Karena saya butuh duit.

    Jujur aja nih ya, saya juga butuh duit. Listrik dan dapur nggak akan nyala kalo saya nggak kerja keras tiap hari di sosmed.

    Bagi sebagian orang hal ini mungkin super duper hina dina, tidak ada penting-pentingnya but let me tell you THIS: Kalian selama ini menikmati konten-konten yang saya buat di dunia maya. Cara kalian menikmatinya mungkin berbeda-beda. Ada yang ketawa ngguyu, ngikik pelan, ngikik dalam hati dan jenis-jenis ketawa yang mungkin saya tidak ketahui lainnya--ada pula yang membaca setengah menghujat, menghakimi atau sambil melirik dengan iri dengki ala tokoh antagonis sinetron 90'an

    Tapi kalian semua tidak membayar untuk itu.
    Kalian tidak membayar untuk hiburan gratis yang saya suguhkan setiap hari.

    Siapa yang bayar? Ya sponsor dong.

    Toh kalian juga seneng kalo saya bagi-bagi kupon gratisan ini itu, giveaway ini itu, saldo ovo dan gopay tiap ada survey pasar. Saya kan nggak boongin kalian dan nggak boongin sponsor. Kalo produknya nggak cocok pasti saya balikin atau bahkan tidak saya review.

    Percaya deh, baca review-review dari duckofyork. Kalo emang nggak cocok atau saya nggak suka bahan-bahannya pasti saya akan bilang.

    Dalam sehari ada berapa tawaran kerjasama yang saya tolak hanya karena saya tidak cocok dengan pemberi sponsor atau bahkan produknya? BANYAK!

    Ini bukan sombong tapi memang begitu kenyataannya. Banyak tawaran kerjasama yang kemudian tidak sesuai dengan ideologi kita (misalnya saya disuruh kampanye "banyak anak banyak rejeki" ya nggak masukkkk lah), tidak sesuai dengan visi dan misi kita, tidak sesuai dengan niche kita, atau bahkan disuruh bohong.

    Bohong ini macem-macem: ada yang bohong-bohongin pembaca bilang barangnya bagus banget padahal enggak, ada yang bohong-bohongin sponsor pake engagement palsu, bahkan yang lebih parah, bohong-bohongin diri sendiri kalo mereka baik-baik saja setelah disuruh campaign seperti itu.

    Meski kita pengabdi konten tapi mohon maaf-mohon maaf aja nih ya, harga diri nggak bisa dibeli, jadi kalo saya disuruh ngibulin pembaca demi duit ratusan ribu sih ogah. Maaf-maaf aja, kita boleh kere yang penting sombong dulu! #sikap 

    Kalaupun netizen menghujat dan nggak setuju sama kita, selama memang itu sesuai dengan ideologi kita ya nggak ada beban toh? nggak ada harga diri yang tersakiti? Sama seperti ketika saya terang-terangan menulis bahwa saya tidak suka rokok tapi juga mendukung dengan industri tembakau.

    Ya nggak masalah dong. Kan itu ideologi saya. Ketika saya membicarakan soal itu, ya jadinya meyakinkan karena memang pendapat saya seperti itu. 

    Itu esensinya Influencer Marketing. Personal. Dekat. Akrab. Intim. 

    Ketika pemerintah menunjuk buzzer untuk mengiklankan Sawit itu Baik misalnya; ya harus tahu latar belakang si buzzer dulu dong. Apakah dia anak pegawai kebun sawit misalnya? Atau dia pernah dapat beasiswa sawit? Atau memang dia yakin dengan manfaat-manfaat sawit dalam kehidupannya?

    Kalau cuma puluhan dan ratusan akun baik dengan atau tanpa nama (anonim) bagaimana masyarakat mau percaya?

    Coba jika yang ngetwit adalah petani sawit yang kini kaya raya dari hasil menanam sawit? Atau anak-anak yang mendapat beasiswa pendidikan dan olahraga dari perusahaan sawit? Mungkin beda hasilnya.

    Ngaca dulu lah, kalo ada orang asing ujug-ujug ngomong ke kita "eh sawit itu baik loh" pasti kita bakal mengernyitkan dahi kan?

    Ini berlaku ke program-program pemerintahan lain yang dibuzz massal ya, nggak cuma sawit doang. Hayo introspeksi.

    Ratusan akun ngepost gambar yang sama dengan caption yang mirip-mirip semacam livetweet massal... apa yakin pesannya akan tersampaikan? Wong mereka yang ngetweet harus mendengarkan, mencerna dan menulis berbarengan. Apa iya bakal maksimal?

    Apa iya seperti itu promosi yang kita butuhkan?

    Tinggal anda yang perlu menjawab.
    . Rabu, 05 April 2017 .


    Oke, berdasarkan judulnya, kalian semua sudah tahu bahwa postingan ini akan berbentuk rant dan nyinyiran yang tidak ada juntrungannya, tapi entah kenapa nih saya percaya banget bahwa bukan cuma saya yang mengalami ini. Mengalami apa sih?
    . Jumat, 16 September 2016 .

    pengalaman nyaris mati


    "I've never been happier to see you!"

    Itulah kata-kata pertama yang keluar dari mulut saya kepada dua orang sahabat saya dan suami saya ketika saya melihat mereka sore ini.

    PS: kalimat yang sama juga terucap didalam hati ketika saya bertemu salah satu profesor yang mata kuliahnya berhasil membuat saya jungkir balik belajar keras semester lalu. 

    Kok bisa?

    Jadi hari ini, saya dan kedua teman saya, sebutlah W & D, pergi ke salah satu pusat perbelanjaan di Yogyakarta. Setelah puas nongkrong-nongkrong dan ngopi-ngopi maka kami pergi mencari kado untuk pak suami yang akan ulang tahun minggu depan. Saat kami berencana turun lewat eskalator, tiba-tiba persis dibelakang saya ada suara gaduh dan saya melihat ada besi jatuh dari atas di belakang kami. 

    Shock. Panik. Lutut super lemas karena kalau saya telat sedikit turun ke eskalator mungkin si besi akan mengenai kepala kami. Besinya kecil sih, tapi still... sukses bikin saya yang pengen skip cek EKG bulan ini membatalkan niat buruk tersebut. Sampai dibawah kami ditenangkan oleh staf salah satu tenant di pusat perbelanjaan itu.

    Setelah lebih tenang, saya memutuskan untuk pindah ke toko sebelah yang merupakan toko interior dan furniture. Persis saat saya dan W sedang memilih-milih tempat make-up dari acrylic...

    LAMPU MALL MENDADAK MATI. IT WAS PITCH BLACK. I ALMOST CRIED. 

    Baru juga mulai tenang, eh mendadak kaget lagi. untung teman-teman saya langsung memegang tangan saya dan menenangkan saya, lantas kami menyalakan senter dari handphone masing-masing dan mencari pintu keluar. Seorang security dari toko interior itu berusaha menenangkan kami. Beberapa saat kemudian lampu di toko itu menyala tapi tidak dengan lampu di bagian lain mall. Karena suasana yang ramai, suara penjelasan mengenai mati lampu dari intercom di pusat perbelanjaan itu juga jadi tidak terdengar lagi.

    Asli, begitu lampu menyala, saya dan kedua teman saya langsung angkat kaki seribu langkah dari pusat perbelanjaan tersebut tanpa aiueo dan babibubebo (walaupun D sempat beli es teh kemanisan).

    Jujur, pada saat lampu menyala dan saya melihat wajah teman-teman saya lagi... asli rasanya lega bercampur happy. Gak tau kenapa, kayak seolah-olah saya gak akan melihat wajah mereka lagi, but i still do anyway.

    And I have never been this thankful before. 

    Kami pulang ke kampus dan kemudian saya menuju ke rumah. Pulang. Saya menyetir dengan tangan masih gemetar meskipun D sudah menenangkan saya selama hampir satu jam setengah di kampus.

    Pak suami membuka pagar pintu rumah. Saya parkir dan turun. Dan disitulah pertama kalinya saya melihat wajah pria yang sudah menjadi bagian dari hidup saya selama dua tahun terakhir dengan perspektif yang berbeda.

    Biasanya saya melihat pak suami dengan tatapan biasa saja. Masuk kerumah dengan biasa saja. Bercerita dengan biasa saja. Hari ini ada sedikit keharuan disitu karena saya masih bisa melihat dia. Setiap malam sebelum tidur kami selalu mengucap syukur atas apa yang terjadi hari itu, dan hari ini ucapan syukur kami sedikit berbeda. Ada perasaan yang berbeda disitu. Entah apa, saya tidak bisa mendeskripsikannya dengan kata-kata.

    Dalam dua tahun ini saya sudah berkali-kali hampir dipanggil sama Yang Maha Kuasa. Salah satunya saya ceritakan disini, saat mobil saya hampir menabrak tabung gas elpiji yang nggelinding di jalan raya, dan masih banyak yang tidak saya ceritakan di blog, misalnya saat mobil saya hampir nabrak truk yang memuat (lagi-lagi) elpiji yang ngerem mendadak, atau saat saya jatuh terguling di pinggir kali saat mengajak anjing saya jalan-jalan, atau saat malam-malam mobil saya 'dipepet' segerombolan pemuda bermotor yang akhirnya mengurungkan niatnya setelah saya membelokkan diri ke kompleks milik militer, dan masih banyak lagi. 

    Setelah dipikir-pikir lagi, saya memang kurang bersyukur. Mungkin ini memang teguran Tuhan supaya saya lebih mensyukuri karunianya, karena tak jarang kalimat "aku ingin mati saja" keluar dari bibir ini tanpa rem. Apalagi kalau deadline lagi rusuh, biasanya kalimat itu muncul tanpa tedeng aling-aling.

    D hari ini berkata pada saya, "kowe ncen hampir ciloko cik, njuk tapi nek kowe sing crito, critone dadi   ndagel, dadi ra medeni. wong koyo kowe matine angel, tenang wae cik," (kamu tuh hampir celaka cik, tapi kalau kamu yang cerita, ceritanya jadi lawakan, jadi gak serem. orang kaya kamu matinya susah, tenang aja cik)

    Iya sih, mungkin Tuhan juga bete nungguin saya bertobat jadi kadang-kadang 'prosesnya' agak dipercepat dengan kejadian-kejadian ajaib. Ya, cerita saya hampir kejatuhan besi dan panik pas mati lampu juga akhirnya menjadi dagelan diantara teman-teman saya (eventhough I'm damn pissed with the mall)

    Well, I am thankful to be alive and well.
    Because I'll See You Later on My Next Post.

    . Rabu, 25 Mei 2016 .



    Okay, i know lah the journal isn't related to the topic, but then it looks good and I need picture. PS: it's really good, you should read it. It's about how you can't run a nation like you run a fortune 500 company.

    I've spent most of my life in Indonesia as I am a native to the vast archipelago and the beautiful countryside. Life is more beautiful when you can spend a dollar for three-course meals a day and still save a few cents for the drink. I ate and breathe indonesian food as much i love chinese food. I went to a frigging law school and studied Indonesian Law for God's sake.

    My dad used to tell me this every dinner; as we have a lot of people in our nation, the only way to govern so much brains and so many thoughts is by military government. He's passionate about the New Order government, and hates the current 'reformed' government. Basically, he's a conservative and believe that someone should take the stern stand to govern and rule the people. 

    I am less inclined to agree with him. I am a liberalist. I believe in freedom of speech and democracy. Although we're not yet a great nation we used to be, we're going there. 30+ years of an era had led us astray and when this whole 'reformed' thing goes up, we went down in chaos trying to throw everything 'new order' out of the window. 

    So therefore, I love this country. I have faith in my nation and in the ideology it brings. I have faith in the extra-delicious nasi padang & bakwan malang. My hate of this country stems from something else.

    Recently, there were series of rape cases unfolded all around Indonesia. It unfolds with the Yuyun case. The case got very little coverage in the media until feminist groups in Indonesia held a vigil for the tragic death. Yuyun was 14 years old at the time, and was gang-raped then left to death after raped multiple times. It was then implied that she died during the rape.

    The reactions from the general public was apalling as it was terrifying; some blame the freaking gang-rape to the victim.

    "it is her fault she walks alone at night in such dark places"
    "if girls cover their aurat this won't happened"
    "girls should not go out at night"

    i mean, what the actual f**k is this. a girl walks home at night with no light because she had no money and access to a better road from school. why the f**k nobody blames the electricity company for providing insufficient light? why the f**k nobody blames the social worker for not providing her a better home? why the f**k nobody blames the national construction service for not building a better road?

    I mean, life in Indonesia sucks if you don't have money and access to the world. Why the hell are you blaming people for not having money and privilege?

    And slowly another rape/gang-rape/murder unveiled. Some hasn't been solved yet, some had the perpetrators locked up, and some... well, some went unnoticed. Some activist said, in 2016 alone, there were 44 women killed in the hands of men, including 7 teenagers.

    This is not because they wore skimpy clothes or walk alone at night. This is because criminal activities does happened and sometimes it runs rampant among our neighborhood. This is because we socially punished our victims. This because we didn't recognized catcalling as a sexual harrasment. This is because we didn't regard women having the same power and the same abilities as men to protect themselves.

    For a nations so diverse, we often forget that we're born from the same kind of womb. We often forget to hold regards our mother and our grandmother, for without them we will never born in this world.

    We often judged characters based on what we see, involving our emotions and our narrow mind on the process, without considering what happened on the other side of the coin. We often hypersexualized ourselves just to get recognition of the general public. Hell, who the f**k hasn't been dressed up at least once to please someone else's taste? We all do. All of it because we're not realizing what's at stake here.

    A woman's honest mistake becomes a stigma for other women.
    Let's say one prostitutes dressed in a very skimpy clothing, then all women in skimpy clothing turns into prostitutes in public's eyes.
    This is wrong. But this is what happened here in Indonesia.
    In the 90s catcalling might been the best way to flirt, but in the 2016 it should've been regarded as sexual harrasment because they meant different things back in the day.
    We're too afraid to teach sex-ed in primary school, we're too afraid to embrace the nature of procreating because of the culture, religion and the taboo. Instead we sheltered those curious minds and repressed them in a way that they exploded fast during their rebellious teenagehood.

    Aren't we all to blame here?
    Lost of lives in the hand of ignorant mass.

    And dear, this is why I hate Indonesia. All of us has our fair share of dirt and responsibilities that shaped our country this way. But then, most of us had stop caring from a long time ago, until it kills us, until it kills our family, until it kills our loved ones.

    Let's reflect and think about it. 
    . Senin, 28 September 2015 .

    Have you ever had a salmonellosis? Apparently I just got one. I had to refrain from eating frozen foods, food from any food booth and food stalls and had to cook my own food in order to recover. And what's more sad than eating your lousy cooking whenever you hang out with your friends in the campus? 

    Okay, so salmonellosis aside, I was forced to rest when my bowel movement can't handle my swag and my fever hasn't gone down in days. So, what did you do when your stomach fails you? You stay at home, you drink a lot of water, and you go on facebook.

    Why facebook? Because, my dear, facebook is the source of all my misdeeds, misinformations, and misbehaving. I often traveled from one page to another in search of human stupidity (although my own account was a living proof that stupidity does exists) and sometimes I ended up in a very entertaining page about anti-vaccine movement, another day I ended up in this weird facebook groups about Anatidaephobia (I said weird because they posts tons of picture of ducks while being a support groups for duck phobia)

    So what kind of page did I find today? 

    It's an Indonesian page, which written in an improper kind of Indonesian language ("for F sake, please use a goddamn punctuation mark" - says my best friend, D, after I show him the page) but still very informative and yet, entertaining. It's a page about Handsome Police Member & Handsome Army Member.....Impersonation. To put it simply, it is a page about catfish. (the link is here, but the page is in Indonesian, and viewer discretion is advised because there were some nudities involved although most were censored)

    I rarely heard about Indonesian online catfish, although catfishing were one of the topic I covered from my old blog that has been deleted. In Ghana, the catfish/scammer use some kind of juju magic called the Sakawa so that their presumed victims will not caught on to their scheme. In Indonesia we acknowledged an almost similar kind of black magic called pengasihan or pelet. 

    I never thought that someday, like the Sakawa, the pelet will also go online on facebook. In the form of fake accounts with handsome policemen photos uploaded. Seriously, these accounts were so fake that you could detect its fakeness just by glancing at their profile, I mean, aside from human stupidity, what kind of reason could cause this kind of madness?

    the truth is this scammer, just like the Sakawa, preys on the lonely women (unfortunately, the age demographic of 30-50 were affected the most), which usually were indonesian who works abroad as household workers (a.k.a TKW), divorced woman looking for a love interest, or even a scorned and lonely housewives. 

    I saw naive women who were bluntly lured by sweet praises which might or might not came from a guy that was a loser, barely has money and trying to scam the bucks away. They hide behind a fake profile picture--which I had to admit, was very representative to blow your ovary away. I saw women who wire huge amount of money (there's one that wire close to 100 million rupiah which was a huge sum coming from a household worker). But admittedly what made me really sad is these women actually hope to meet their prince charming someday, and will do anything for the scammer including posting compromised pictures!

    What in the world was happening. I saw a woman who already had a teenage son putting up 'married' status in facebook with one of the fake account. The marriage never happened. She lost 65 million rupiah and i can't imagine what happened to her son. 

    Truth to be told, it's terrifying how they got fooled so easily, over and over again, with the same scheme to wire their money. It's terrifying how an empowered woman could lose so easily to loneliness. All they wanted to have is someone who loves them and showered them with affection, and they found it in facebook. but sometimes, their greed blinds them from actually realizing that everything is too good to be true. Maybe the biggest blessings to humanity nowadays is indeed an awareness.

    We all are social animals. That I can't argue. But were our animalistic instinct that intense so we actually yield to loneliness and let ourselves fooled by these scammer?

    There's six billions of people in this planet. A countless stars up above our head. Yet we still found an excuse to be lonely. Maybe it's just my naivety or there's actually a different meaning to lonely in these situation? Or maybe lonely was a term for sexual needs. Who knows. (In which, my best friend, D, will shout out loud, "ladies, you have a brain! control your vajayjay!"). 

    Loneliness will kill you. 
    So don't let it seek you.


    . Jumat, 28 Agustus 2015 .

    [disclaimer; I wrote this not to scare you guys from buying a house, but merely sharing my experiences and get some of my point across. Buying and having your own house in your 20s is totally cool and awesome. But then, there's a lot of things goes behind the scene that most of you won't even realized now that it's there]

    Most of my friends will hate me for saying this. Afterall, the best investments around here is still properties; house, lands, apartments, you named it. So, in just a few months after my 20th birthday, I bought a house. A small cute home near an airport, 15 minutes from the city by car and 10 minutes by bike (traffic jams ftw); 7.5 meters times 12 meters. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms. Perfect for a small family, too big for a 20 years old. 

    I paid quite a fortune for this house, and it's under my name. It's a sign of significant success from my workplace (I earned quite a lot as an account executive). My parents also donate me a huge sum for me to be able to have the house repainted and renovated a bit since the contractor did a lousy job on the house. 

    Most of my friends (which is around my age) were envious with the revelation that I already had my own home. After they graduate from college two years later, some came to me asking for a few tips on managing the household, as they just apply for a mortgage. 

    The thing is, two years later; I (slightly) regret(-ish) my decision on buying a house. 

    ***
    People think that owning properties makes you a great investor, that you have invest on something you could sell or rent later. Now this is where most people are wrong.

    Once you buy a house, you get comfortable and settling down, you get attached. You don't want to sell the properties because you thought the price could get higher and higher with each day goes by. You think that "this house is my accomplishment, I won't sell until I get the right price".

    Then you started living in it, on your first month you pay for electricity and water you realized you can save a lot more by not turning on the air conditioner. Then you realized it's hot as hell. In the rainy season, it feels better (I save 40% more money on rainy season because of this) but in Jogja, in the middle august, it feels like you're living in the middle of the Gobi. It doesn't help that your place doesn't really have a lot of big trees as a shade because tree leaves are troublesome and you have to rake it up every evening. 

    You then realized that there were ants and mosquitos. You constantly battling your food vs ants and the winner, you can guess: it's the ants. You can't leave food recklessly and had to stay clean, and cleaning a house everyday is a chore when you got 9 to 5 job in your hand already.

    Then you realized that you have to pay for taxes! As every year goes by, your house started to deteriorate and need maintenances, but the taxes keep bubbling, and you hate the government so hard for making you pay for a mere shelter. The house maintenance itself were always a pain in the arse as something is always not right, when you think you can relax, the water from the tap starts leaking, there will be lightbulbs that needed replacement, your cable tv not working, your internet not working, such and such. 

    Well, when you think it's over, came your neighborhood watch. You pay for security, trash pick-up service, and a few neighborhood fundraising you have to attend or your neighbors will start talking about you behind their back. Sometimes even if you attend and help out they will still talking about you behind your back. Nobody is to be trusted these days (although I have a few amazing neighbors whom I'd do anything for them, just as they'll do anything for me). 

    You then realize everything that has a price tags keeps getting more expensive. There's phone bills, electricity, water, internet, cable tv, and at first you'll think "oh i won't need cable tv" then you realized that you need that form of entertainment after long days at work and the local channel were not as entertaining anymore. Then you'll say "broadband internet? a 3G/4G modem will do since my office had a good internet" and then you realize the cable tv came with broadband internet and it's so much cheaper you only have to add a few more thousand rupiahs to it, and there you are swayed by the power of advertising only to realized that their connection sucks and you have to spend time waiting for technicians to take care of them.

    But then people always say this to me; when I got married, I don't have to worry where will I live with my husband, I got it all sorted out.
    No you're wrong.

    My carport were so small that it fits only one car and one or two motorbike. Both of us were driving. Imagined how we scrambled to fight for the rights on using the carports.
    You then realized your significant others consume just as much electricity, water and phone as you. And it's time where you share the bills, but somehow you want everything to go with your way and don't want to compromise. Sharing the bills means you compromise in how long you get to use the phone and the goddamn air conditioner (without the AC I will be only paying 1/3 of what I paid each month, seriously) and you don't want that privileges taken away from you. But on the other hand you're happy to have someone so handy at home that could save you money from calling maintenance technicians.

    Then you start comparing your expenses and it's a lot bigger than when you still renting. And you were swayed to rent again and sell your house, but then you already have too much furnitures and love the house (because it's your accomplishment, remember?)

    ***

    Having a house has its own perks and downside. I was lucky that I get to learn this at such young age, So hopefully by sharing this experience with you, you can consider what will you need to make that house your home. Because buying a real house, needs a lot of consideration and weighing every options that you have. Be smart and be wise. 

    In this economy a lot of things could happen. Mortgage can rises, property prices bubbled up and then went south. There's more to investment than just lands and houses. If you think you are not ready to managed a house of your own, think again, you might be right. But if you think you are capable of doing so on your own, go ahead. It's always good to have somewhere where you can cool off privately.

    Much love from the duck-chess.
    . Sabtu, 27 Juni 2015 .

    If there's one thing I'm pretty sure I hate more than anything, It's ironing my clothes. Truth to be told I was so comfortable on having the clothes ironed by our live-in maids for the 16 years I spent on my parents house, and the rest usually were done by the 'pay-per-kilograms laundry' which were very cheap and can easily be found anywhere in Indonesia. With all due respect but the cost for ironing a kilogram of clothes usually goes around Rp. 2000-4000 (around 2 cents-5 cents per kilogram!) and my time is the most valuable treasure I have, since, you know, I go to college and I'm lazy, so paying around Rp. 5000 to Rp. 12.000 (from 5 cents to USD 1) I can have all my clothes perfectly ironed and pressed and folded.

    After living alone, my mom kind of paying for an in-house maid to take care all my needs, including ironing the clothes, which at first I boldly refuse but I can't anymore since my mom loves to be in charge of everything (yes, now we know where my traits came from) including my very single and plain household life. So, yes, I'm spoiled and rotten when it comes to ironing my own clothes. And even when our maid is on the leave, I will just simply sort my clothes, throwing it into the washing machine, drying them, and leave a pile of dry, clean, and wrinkled clothes on a laundry basket until our maid came back.

    image are taken from dresscodeit


    These kind of things changes when Alfa came around. Why?

    First, Alfa is a highly organized, meticulous clothes folder, and an obsessive compulsive "laundry day" cleaner. He meticulously rack up his well-sorted dirty clothes before bringing them to the laundry. I am the "throw everything to the bin and sort it later" kind of person. Hell, he spent hours to clean and tidy the place around once he has the mood to do so and I'm the kind of person who clean and tidy everything everyday but not really meticulously (like I'll left strands of hairs or bits of debris here and there).

    Second, coming from a humble and very independent background, he knows his way around household chores. Something which I never learn until I hastily left my childhood home to discover the world. Yes, everyone, I just knew how the washing machine works when I'm 16--not proud. 

    Third, you know those people who watches and/or reads how to basic?? I'm them.

    Alfa has no washing machine in his previous run-down rental house, and the cost of express-washing, even in the pay-per-kilos laundry were pretty expensive, so when he was at his clinical rotation, I was tasked with the hefty burden of washing his clothes. Yes. Hefty burden, indeed. But his work clothes require no sordid work of ironing, so I just dry them and the next morning, the guy will pick up his clothes and wear it. 

    I was so safe for so long, until that day when he came back from Palembang a few weeks ago. 

    As per his stay of course he rack up a ton of dirty clothes, and knowing he had to handwash them back in Palembang moved my heart (I hate knowing he woke up at 2 AM just to wash clothes because water is rationed from 4PM to 6AM only) So I sorted all of his clothes, wash it, dry it... and... Iron them. And here's where things got worse. 

    I have no idea what I'm doing. First thing first, he pinpointed that I've been using our drying machine wrong all of this time. I recently bought a top load washing & drying machine, something which I wasn't accustomed to. So, instead of lining up all the clothes with the dryer tube, I just put all of our clothes in there (like you do in front-loading washing machine with built in dryer). So, 1 for Alfa and 0 for me. 

    I was standing there in the laundry room alone because my maid were taking her leave before I collected all my guts and run into Alfa in the kitchen (he was robbing our refrigerator) and asked, "baby, how did you Iron and fold these?" which he answer with burst of laughter. He teach me how to fold clothes properly and pressed them with the iron. Well, for the first time homegirl doesn't have to log in to youtube and watches how to basic to do things. While I was dazed and dumbfounded by the fact I just ironed a piece of clothing properly that isn't mine to begin with, he then asked, "you never do this before?"

    "do what before?"

    "folding and ironing your clothes"

    "well if i can fold and iron properly, I wouldn't feel the need of having this much of clothes hanger am I?"

    And he laughed as if it was something really funny. For me, it wasn't. I'm ashamed that eventhough I'm a holier-than-thou feminist, a mere task like ironing some clothes has brought me to my knees. 

    Some (extreme) feminist might said, because of equalities, women should not worry if they can't do basic household chores like this perfectly because it's not women's job anymore. Well, in this matter I disagree. I felt so small than when I have an equal position with a man, I still can't do something that a man could do perfectly. I felt like I'm just this pseudo-feminist who is actually a spoiled brat who just flatly refused to learn how to handle household chores, but even worse, I felt like I'm the loser, and I lose to a man, in terms of ironing and folding the clothes. And losing was the last thing I want to feel. I hate losing. 

    So right now, the first step that I will challenge on our gender equality roles on our wedding is that I, who was born spoiled and rotten, will do every household chores perfectly. Including ironing our clothes. Because a feminist should be a strong woman who can handle everything, even a simple task like folding the clothes. And being a feminist is where i'll be.
    . Rabu, 18 Maret 2015 .

    Karma. Simple words, big meaning.

    I never really thought that I'd be writing this and make the side of my story heard. At least, 4 years ago I wasn't. As usual, I change the name of the people that were involved in this story. But, for those who were reading this and realized who they are; I hope now you understand the repercussion of your actions. 

    Most of us understands karma as the universal law of the nature--you will reap what you sow. What you do in this life will affect you in your next phase of life. This, is the story of a man who broke a girl's heart and get away with it for years until karma catch up with him. This is the story of forgiveness and letting go. This is my story, and is my side of the story.

    quotes by thegoodquote on instagram

    My first love happened in 7th grade. Contrary to the popular beliefs that your first love should be an awesome guy with an awesome personality and awesome looks, mine is a nerd with thick glasses, greasy hair, cheek full of zits and puberty acne, and barely even talks to girl. He's my senior and was in 9th grade. Let's call him A. Despite of my confidence, bubbly personalities, happy-go-lucky attitude and we are in the same social circle with tons of mutual friends, I barely talk to him. I'm so shy yet scared.

    The opportunity to talk to him came the next year when we talk about computers and all stuff nerdy. I was so happy. We talk a lot about things, about how he owned a forum in the interwebz, about his blog and my (old) blog, about his family, and a lot of things. So happy that by the time we get really close on the beginning of the 9th grade, I confessed to him and he reject me.

    It's so sad that he didn't like me, he said I'm not his type, that we should stay friends. That made me quite sad. This is the beginning of a series of bad decisions that I will made until this very day. I was close with another boy and began dating him. We broke up a year later and I was drawn to A again. We got close again, but then I found out he is close to another girl and I was dating another boy again to hide those pain. When I broke up with the second rebound guy, we got close again and talks so much about life and politics and philosophies together. I was in 11th grade and he just get into the 2nd best university in Indonesia (because the first one is my alma mater, sorry guys, but I'm bias just like that).

    He promised that we will watch a certain movies about World War II together because he was very interested with World War II. Too bad, turns out he was seeing another girl (again) and watch the movie with the girl and his friends (which was my friends too! See? this is why I don't really like to use the terms "friend" so much). I was devastated that I literally threw myself to the third rebound guy that is a jerk to me; yet not long after that, A broke up with this girl--AND WE GET CLOSE AGAIN.

    I WAS LIKE, ARE YOU FUKEN KIDDING ME.

    but you know, he has his own charm. And I think he got me wrapped up in his spell that I will choose him over anyone--even over a boy that truly loves me and will do anything for me. We maintain this toxic relationship where he'll go to me when he's in a bad condition and need comforts but he'll disappear when he felt comforted enough.

    And I began to doubt myself at this point. I'm sure that he doesn't even love me, but my compassion get over my logic. We did a lot of things together--yet I was seeing another men on the side. It's very toxic for anyone and even our friends encouraged us to be together--doesn't work.

    We're too close to call ourselves as friends yet too far to call ourselves as a couple. I wasn't ready for any kind of dare. On his birthday, I was at school and I received a phone call that his dad passed away. Yes, right on his birthday, so imagine I was freaking out and I decided to skip class even though I'm on 12th grade and need to prepare for national exam. I love him too much to even think about my own priorities. And he always gives me hope by drawing me close to him each and each time.

    I was there for every worst moment that happened in our lives, and looking back, almost all worst moments of my life were caused by him, whether intentionally or unintentionally. After his dad funeral, we became really close again and our friends keeps pressuring us to be together, to which he replied; "i can't be with her since she's too stubborn and will do anything as she pleases, i took her more like a best friend,"

    well, best friend my ass.

    BEST FRIENDS FUKEN STAY FOR EACH OTHER.

    yet he was never there on all of my worst time and... not too long after we had that conversation; he dated another girl, let's call her T. He describes her to me as amazing, religious, beautiful, smart. Imagine how the goddamn pain struck my heart at that very moment. He brought the girl to hang out with our friends without inviting me. Yet, everytime he had a problem with that girl, guess which bitch he was running to? ME. If he got into a fight with her, with who he'll seeks comfort with? ME. I always listen to his crap 100% at the time eventhough it hurts me. And when it hurts I will fool myself by saying "I will just be happy that he's happy"

    But this can't go on for long because I started to date rebound guy number something--sorry I lost track of exes sometimes, on which, this particular ex, had drop me off in the middle of nowhere because I cut my hair and he was lost in the sea of his own jealousy. Then with the intention to forget about rebound guy number something and A, I dated yet another rebound guy...which in the end, reveals to me that he can swing both ways.

    Those bad decisions led me into a blessing in disguise though. I was accepted in both of my alma mater and A's alma mater. To be honest, I don't really want to leave town and go to my current alma mater, but I can't stand this unholy ways of getting a rebound guy over and over again and falling head over heels to A over and over again.

    So, off I went. 500+ kilometres away from my bestfriends, friends, family, home. In order to AVOID FALLING IN LOVE WITH ONE GUY THAT I'VE BEEN "SEEING" FOR 5 YEARS. I was like a drug addict, and everytime he calls me I got a fuken relapse; so I block his number, delete his contact, and forgets everything about him.

    It wasn't easy though. We met once when I was home for holiday because my friends insists that he should've come, besides, he and T wasn't in a good condition. I believe it was my bestfriends trying to play cupid, but I was seeing a guy that I really love at that time so I ended up ignoring him all the way. We did exchange contacts again, in courtesy of making my friends happy. Am I a compassionate person or not? Blergh.

    We started light texting through BBM once to say happy new year, happy birthday, merry christmas, ied mubarak and such. I didn't really care with what he said. In fact I was so happy with my relationship that no matter how much we talk, I didn't even look at him anymore. I let him go to be happy and I want to be happy as well. So it's actually very civil.

    Until the day that broke up, two years ago.

    I knew his relationship gets rocky when T was accepted in a college that requires a train commute further than A's commute to his college, and A was very busy until he neglected T. But I don't care. If she was neglected by his own boyfriend; why do I have to meddle? She's not my friend and he's just an old piece of past for me.

    But if only the break up was clean, because it turns out that T was seeing this GIRL. Yes, T turns out to.... I don't know how to put this cleanly on in the right way... like girls also. Basically when A neglected her, T got really close with this boyish girl who is rumored to be a lesbian, let's called her K. T & K likes japanese Idol group so it's easy for them to conversate and since they are girls, it's easy for them to have sleepovers, etc. NO I'M NOT SUGGESTING SOMETHING HAPPENED BETWEEN THEM. It's just that the relationship between T&K grew bigger while T&A grew further apart. And A confided to us that K always suggests sexual innuendos to T.

    He was ripped apart and guess who was the person he turns to? yes, me.

    He confided everything in me and I was like, oh well, he'll get better. And he's not getting better. If else, he's going in a downward spiral. Mainly because he loved her and she gave him a reason not to be. We meet up, and he tried to say sorry to me in the worst way possible in front of my friends. You want to know my reaction?

    "Well, obviously, from the time that you ditch me for that girl, I already gave you an options--either I slapped you or God slapped you. And you chose the latter one, and boy, was that hurts,"

    He was dead silent as if I just hit his head with bricks. Our friends laugh but I felt a dead air around me. For me to say things that ruthless in a cold blood manner, wasn't something very unusual in our circle of friends, but this time I didn't really feel anything. I didn't intend to joke. It's a pure evil and malicious comment and it was very malignant for me to say such things to his face.

    In fact I was smiling. and I was happy he suffered. I was glad that God has chosen the right time to give him a slap in the face. I couldn't be happier with my boyfriend and my current life, and he sinks so low. For once, seeing him sad doesn't bring out the best in me. I don't go and comfort him. I learned that what we used to have was cheap and barely there. It was one sided. And he was one sided now, no?

    Later, I wouldn't think so much about it because I thought he learned his lesson very well. In fact, no. Two years after that encounter, we met again. This time he was flying to my town to attend a cross-religion seminar--something that used to be our favorite topic. I picked him up with Alfa, but beforehand I told Alfa that me and him used to have a long history. He was agitated a bit by the fact we're going to pick up someone from my past that used to be one of the reason I move town.

    The man I was picking up was nowhere near the man I used to love. He's thinner, had this shabby look, hasn't graduated yet for 7 years, and the worst--his eyes were dead. I know that he hasn't move on from T yet, and I think it's eating him inside. I pitied him so much that I even decided to pay for lunch and take him to his meeting. That wasn't love. That was pity.

    Later, one of my friend told me he has problems with his lungs and there's this crazy fact that T still contacted him and gave him yet another false hope, because if he tried to chase T, she'll disappear, but she'll reappears anytime she needs him. That eats him alive everyday. Most of our friends already tired with him not getting over T for two years and had given up on him already. They're sick of the level of toxicity T has bring into A's life.

    Hearing this, I felt so sad and I think he had enough of this karma wheels. But that's not for me to decide. Whether the wheels will turn and return into its normal state, or for some reason it was stuck in a state like this, that is the Universe to decide. For me, justice had been served already and I don't want to see him in an even worse situation. I don't even wish this kind of ill state for my worst enemies. Everybody keeps pestering me to forgive him, but in fact, wasn't the one who needs to forgive himself was his truly?

    Lesson learned; never take karma so lightly. Whatever we did, somehow will come back to us. And if it wasn't enough, it'll haunt us for the rest of our lives.

    For A, wherever you are, I'm only wishing for your happiness, health and prosperity. I truly wish that you would find happiness the way I do. And I hope that you'll find someone who loves you better that anyone else. I was bitter for the 5 years we spent together--but hey, if you've never been the jerk that you were, I wouldn't end up in a very good hands. 
    . Rabu, 11 Maret 2015 .

    I'm engaged to Alfa for a month tomorrow, and let me tell you this: I love him. I do. A lot, actually. And I know, love is an unconditional state of feeling, but I got to tell you this: I HATE HIS JOB.

    Okay, hate is actually a very strong word, so I'm going to rephrase it: I'm not psyched about his job.

    I love animals, I do. And I saw his passion towards animals and I love it. I really understand that being a veterinary surgeon is his calling and I got to respect him for that. I saw him going tough times when everyone else around him wants him to works in the government and he didn't really want that. I went to him and ask him what he really wants in life and he said it boldly, "I want to be a vet surgeon"

    So I become the Vet's (future) wife. No big deal. Vet's wife is awesome--will never be as awesome as being a WAGs or wife of a multi millionaire, but still awesome. Boy, I was wrong, and I got to hand my hat over to all those Veterinarian's wife around the world--who isn't a vet, by the way, since mostly married girls from the same occupation--you ladies, are awesome, I don't know how you can keep up with that, but pure respect bro.

    I already felt the hardships on our first few months of dating since he was on a clinical rotation. On our first week of dating he was stationed in a zoo and he snaps cute picture of animal for his report and somehow he decided to send it to me because: (a) he knows I love that zoo and I regularly go to that zoo just to (somehow) donate my money for tickets, trainers tips, etc, so the animals can live longer and (b) who doesn't love cute animals? I mean he sent me a photo of a cute orangutans drinking a bottled tea--WHO DOESN'T LOVE ORANGUTANS AND BOTTLED TEA?? 

    But then shit goes down because he showed me a photo of Prairie Dog's necropsy that he did there. I almost puke and I cried straightaway because... It's necropsy. Technically it's an autopsy for a dead prairie dog and let me tell you one, that is one cute fella you cut open there, bro. 

    Then the next week he showed me the photo of goat's feces he's been inspecting. I asked him how can he determined whether the sample of goat's feces is healthy or not--and he proceeds to show me where the worm is and how the worm lives in the feces--all while we're cuddling and canoodling in a romantic evening enjoying my home cooked meal.

    There was this one time where he promised me he'll took me watch the Annabelle, and the queue in the cinemas were crazily long. He can't come because he had to helped a cow getting birth so I queue alone despite how boring it is and I want to cry because I felt so alone just to get us tickets. That feeling kind of disappears when he said the birth process was successful and he looks so happy. 

    I know that his job is to save the world, one animal at a time. And wasn't it fun to save the world? yes. You can ask any superheroes in the world whether they love saving the world: they'll say yes. Try asking lois lane how it feels like to be with superman or try asking mary jane why she can't be with spiderman. Being the wife of a superhero sucks. And I can confirm this big time because it involves a lot of worrying, a lot of sleepless night and a lot of praying. 

    It happened just last monday; there's a female cat that needs a C-Section. He never did a C-Section alone before. I was kneeling and praying like crazy the whole time it happened (although I was somewhere else) and few hours later when it's done he just sent a text saying 'it's done, i'm so exhausted' to which I bombarded him with questions about how it went because I was so worried he's going to kill the cat.

    I actually have a strong beliefs in Alfa's ability to perform surgery on animal since I know he's really good at doing it so I shouldn't have to worry that he's going to kill the cat. But still, when your spouse confided their problems with you, and yet all you can do is wait and do nothing, you'll feel useless. Plus, he dated fellow veterinarian students before, so...insecurities alert. 

    Imagine sitting home knowing he's doing something that risked his life (like, he can bit by a rabies' ridden dog--knock on wood). How can you not hate yourself for not being able to do anything about it?

    So I did some researching on veterinarian job. And then I stumbled to an old manga that I happened to like because my bestfriend reccomends it to me. The title is "Wild Life"


    Basically it's about a Vet named Tesshou Iwashiro who has a "perfect pitch" abilities and was stationed on the Wildlife Station on the R.E.D Vet Hospital in Japan. He performs a lot of complicated surgeries on animal and was never seen backing down on a patient. His determination on being a veterinarian surgeon amazed me right from the start, so I kept reading until I felt like, maybe this is why Alfa wants to be a vet.

    But then, there's always downside in everything. The downside of me reading this manga so I can love Alfa's job is I kept asking him about things I read in the manga. And I believed it was a nuisance to him because he had to explained everything to me, unless I will kept on asking about that things--yes, I'm curious yet annoying just like that.

    Like, "baby can you perform surgery on fish?" "what is empyema?" "baby can our pet dog be a nurse dog?" was among the stupid questions I asked. Stupidity confirmed, I know.

    But see, here's the thing: I'm not a vet, I wanted to be one since I love animals so much but my dad objects them and in honour of being the only heiress of my family business, I agreed with them and go to lawschool instead (note: It should've been either business school or medical school--they went berserk after my choice of college, but it's still number one lawschool in Indonesia, what up), I don't understand how a Vet can easily took down an animal if they have to, because I cried every time my dogs won't eat and didn't sleep whenever they showed some sickness. I always worried whenever Alfa works really late, and I cringe on the sight of bloods--so it's pretty explanatory why we can't connect even on modular level regarding to his job. Even so, I want to be useful to him, and I want him to feel like he can confide to me anything, and that includes his work day. 

    I want to love something that is his biggest hope and dream. I want to love something that he loved doing and I want to be his source of strength whenever he needs it. And I want to be very supportive of his choice of occupation even though it horrifies me to do so.

    After all, I'm going to marry a vet and his life, will be my life too.




    . Senin, 09 Maret 2015 .



    I was wondering (and probably in a stupid way), why people go to Jerry Springer's Show to confide their feelings? Is it worth the time and effort to solve a life problem ludicrously while being watched by the entire nation--and the entire universe who has access to video streaming facilities

    Basically, Jerry Springer show is a talkshow where they supposed to resolve conflicts. Any kind of conflicts, from your bitch is mabitch now kind of problem to KKK kind of problem. And it's actually good because I have watched the older version (where they actually sit in the talkshow studio set-ups) and see how Jerry is actually the most neutral mediator ever... but then, they changed formats and involved a firefighter pole/stripper pole, just a fold on seats and empty stage with bodyguards waiting because all the guest do is.... fight. 

    Some of the episodes were as stupid as hell, usually ranging from "i'm banging my wife's bff/sister/archnemesis" to "i used to be a man". And stupidly, this show is also a platform for someone to come out! Hell I am not gay but even if I am, I will never want such a sensitive moment to be televised either!

    So I did some research and find this thread on Reddit instead. The thread starter used to appear in one of those 'cheaters' episode. He said they flew him in, put him in a nice hotel for two days, give him great food and pay him US$ 300 for appearing in the show, but they changed bits and bits of the story on the air. And fun fact, it's not 100% truth either but it's not 100% lie. 

    Taking this show with a grain of salt is what I do best as a professional couch potato. and as what DarpaWeenie pointed out in said Reddit Thread:
    "Suppose that helped put things in perspective, if you think your own life is messed up, always someone out there with an even more messed up story. Suppose that's what makes Springer and the like so popular. You have a crappy day, turn on the tube, and watch people with really crappy lives."
    Was our life turned into a web of crappy stuff that we need to watch other people deals with crappier stuff? Was it so hard to just live for yourself that you need to watch others get effed up too?

    But I guess it is. We crave for our existence to be recognized by people around us, and we did that by showing material stuff, be it our beauty, our wealth, our social status, etc. Sometimes we did that to the point that we stopped being whoever we are. We looked down at the less unfortunate and sometimes we share not because of we want to share but we looked down to other people in shame, or in pity.

    So let's make pact to ourselves, in order to be a better man, we should stop feeling better just because someone is feeling crappier than us. We should start feeling better because we want to feel better and we want to help those who were crappier than us.

    May the Universe always guide your hands to the right place in the right time.